Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Obama Practically Cheating in Texas

From the AP:

"The Obama campaign is trying to simplify the [Texas primary/caucus] process by calling it the 'Texas Two-Step,' and used former 'Dancing with the Stars' and Dallas Cowboy standout Emmitt Smith to promote it Wednesday."

I know that ABC/ESPN likes to give equal billing to Smith's bullshit DwtS victory (Smith stole that victory, and America knows it), but I expect better both from the AP and from Obama.

C'mon, Barack! This is our new America? Using Smith's "fame" from a show that only shut-ins watch? This might be the most uninspiring thing the Obama campaign has come up with. A mush-mouthed former athlete who won a silly dance contest?

And I don't want to question the judgement of our new President, when there is still so much question of judgement to be done of the current one (i.e.: That satellite had to be shot down? No one who knows what they are talking about seems to think so). But mister future President Obama, you are trying to make the Texan Primary/Caucus system easier to understand, yes? You aren't being super clever, and trying to make it more confusing for Dallas Cowboy fans, right? Because really, if you are looking for help in the realm of "Making Something Somewhat Tricky to Understand Into Something Reasonably Easy to Understand", I'm pretty sure there are better choices than Emmitt. Hell, even if you put it through a Dallas Cowboy filter, I think the new super mellow Deion Sanders could handle it a bit better. Please peruse your guy's work and reconsider:

I have yet to verify the rumor that Hillary, looking to overcome the famous athlete/dancer/mushmouth (FADM) gap will soon announce Shaquille O'Neal as her running mate. (From '07 All Star Game)


Andrew Wice said...

Too lame for hating.

Here's a question: do either of these phrases have a chance of catching on if I keep making a reference to them?

1) The orangutan is unfazed.

2) Fucking chickens made me mad.

Muumuuman said...

I think "The orangutan is unfazed" was Bush's campaign slogan for 2004.

Andrew Wice said...


If I recall, Kerry's mistake was running with "I'm a fucking chicken" which might have spawned "Fucking chickens made me mad." And his candidacy was doomed.

Lucy Rhode said...

My laughter might be secondary to lots of in-flight alcohol, but that chicken thing is sort of fun.

Andrew Wice said...

All right Lucy, your vote counts.

Just know that I'm also prepared to drag "that chicken thing is sort of fun" into the mainstream, if necessary.

Lucy Rhode said...

If at your book signing you see a woman wearing a t-shirt that references chickens, she might be Lucy. She might not. Might I suggest caution?

Andrew Wice said...

If you show up at my book signing and I'm wearing a t-shirt made out of chicken, may I suggest you use caution?